hope

Finding Hope in Hardship

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Tragedy is never a good thing, but sometimes, at the end of a dark tunnel, there’s light. We don’t often see the big picture or the orchestra below the pit, but something beyond our understanding is happening and in the near or far future, we find that light, that one good thing that comes out from disaster.

The pandemic was heart breaking for those that lost loves ones, it caused depression from isolation from many, for some, they end of a marriage. Many negative results that may have been life changing, but the one good thing for some, would be that it brought in more opportunities to work from home, especially good for those that live far from work.

Not taking traumatic situations lightly, but we may not see the bigger picture until later, keeping in mind, that no one lives forever, there’s a time for all of us to leave this earth and that being with God is heaven is a much better place. I didn’t understand why the Lord took my Mom early. I was really close to my Mom and had a bad relationship with my Dad. We always argued, he never heard me out and it was like that for a very long time. Knowing that I had a really good relationship with my mom and that I spent precious time with her while I was able, I didn’t feel any regrets, but had it been my dad, it would’ve been different. Just shortly before she passed, questioning God “why,” I tried to see the bigger picture and I thought about how me and my siblings were always closer to my mom. Years later, we’ve had good times and good moments with my dad. My relationship with my dad is much better and the things that my mom would suggest like, playing golf with my dad, had come to pass after she passed away. It’s almost like she’s praying in heaven for that very thing to happen.

The sorrow from the big loss in my life, brought me to humility. Sometimes God brings the hardships to humble us, to refine our heart. For some having gone through trauma and have healed from it are helping others in that very situation.

I was watching a short video of someone retired who was struggling to pay for everything and needed to find a roommate to get by, which resulted in good companionship. Not only did she no longer struggle financially, but now, not lonely with a new good friend sharing life with her.

There was a testimony of one of the Jewish ladies held hostage in Gaza that was released. Rather than seeing nothing but darkness in the situation, she found her purpose in the dark tunnel as one to comfort a young girl and to help bring light to others.

The difficulties of relationships, we sometime hate the very thing in our spouse that is there to stir us up, but some traits as we may see as hang ups are there to shape us into a person with more patience or children that bring our own issues up to the surface until we realise the things we need to work on in ourselves like control or rage. These are things that we need to give to God and ask Him to help us. Years later, we see the good results from the hardships that have shaped us.

We may never understand why we had to experience certain things at the moment and may live through life on earth without knowing, but at the end of the rainbow is a pot of gold, no, but let’s just ask God to show us the reason. At the same time, being prepared to die any day, loose someone of something any day, which requires knowing where you’ll go when die and having a strong foundation while on earth that when the strong storms of life comes to knock you down, you won’t fall.

My prayer for others…”Lord, I pray that you will reveal yourself to others through the good and the bad, helping others see the light in the most difficult situations, trusting that there is hope in you as they continue to move forward in life, through the darkest and hardest times in life, let your light shine, leading them to a more blessed path of love, joy, peace and happiness. I pray that for your healing upon their heart and that they would receive you into their life. Be their firm foundation through life until the day comes from them to leave this earth.” In Jesus name! Amen!

God’s Faithfulness in the Small Things

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Since June, I have been searching for a new car. It took a while for me to make up my mind on which car to buy. I must have test drove at least 7 cars. I then narrowed my list down to 3, then 2 and finally, after almost three months, I was down to 1. I was taking my time to look because my car still took me from point A to point B. As I wrote about last week, my check engine light turned on when I was on my way to the bank, which I’ve been meaning to ask about a car loan from for a long while, but kept putting it off. A few days later when I got really serious about buying, the light stopped showing.

I needed to search for the best price and I thought I found it in Los Angeles and that I had to drive down there, but of course I’d rather not do the long drive. I began to be interested in a newer model and couldn’t find a similar car close by, then all of a sudden I felt that I should expand my search by $3k and lo and behold, the same exact car, same color on the exterior and interior, around the same mileage, was an hour and a half drive away from me and, it was almost $2k less than the one in L.A. So I drove over there and they gave me a great deal on a trade in. I had to drive to the bank for the deposit and drive back. When I arrived to the bank, there was no one in line. Then I needed to use the bathroom, my cell phone was dying and I didn’t have a charger. The teller told me that the store next door had a bathroom so I went to the neighboring store and close to the bathroom was a rack of phone chargers. What perfect timing and placement!

It was a long drive and by the time I got back I was tired, hungry and they were about to close. I filled out the paperwork quickly on a tiny screen and thought I saw some numbers that seemed off. I kept thinking about it, started to feel anxious so I prayed, “Lord, I don’t feel good about the numbers, I think something is off. The fees seem way too high. If the numbers are really off and I’m being charged for something that I shouldn’t be changed for, please clear it up. Have the numbers person catch it and let me know. Amen!” My prayer was something like that. Anyhow, the day after, someone called and told me that I was charged for something I shouldn’t have been charged for because my down payment was large enough to not need it. Then I asked him if there were other fees included that were optional and he disclosed another add on. So sad that this place didn’t ask me about adding these additional options, but God bless the guy’s soul who called me about this. If it weren’t for him, that company would look so terrible. Overall, the optional fees taken off totaled to almost $5k.

Even if it’s just material, a car, God was along my side, opening doors, guiding me and after the phone call, wow, I mean…how often would you find someone that honest to do such a thing? I believe the Lord really spoke to him. God’s has been showing me His faithful hand over my life. What may seem like such a small thing, is really a big thing when it comes to the way the whole sequence of events come together and prayers get answered along the way.

Finding Joy in a Desolate Season

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Life is great when all is well, but we all know that it’s not always happiness and joy. There are seasons of rain and drought. The passages of scripture in the Bible in the book of Ecclesiastes says that there is a time for everything :

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven: 2A time [a]to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;
A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;
A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones,
And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to gain,
And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
And a time to throw away;
A time to tear,
And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak;
A time to love,
And a time to hate;
A time of war,
And a time of peace.

There have been times of sadness and joy, times when I feel like I’m in a desert, a place with no water to fulfill my thirty soul. There have been times of rejoicing when hopes come into fruition, but in the dry season of life, should there never be any joy?

Moreover, the rain in life that satisfies the thirst for dreams, wishes or goals, doesn’t always quench and coming to realizing once again, the joy inside me.

It’s been a long while, walking through life, trying to put my faith in Christ, when things seem to not go as expected, a waiting pattern that seems to strip hope away day after day. The ever so common question arises, “why God why?

Feeling distant as if God is silent, doubt starts to settle in. Where is He? Is He still listening? Then a series of events within two days happens, each resulting from the next. First, receiving a notification of a compromised account, led to having to get a new card and finally, after searching for a new car for the past month and a half, I finally inquired of a car loan, she told me I was approved and granted the exact amount I was thinking in my head.

In addition, since searching for a car for so long, I wasn’t under pressure because my car was still doing fine, mechanically. Then for the first time, when I turned on my car before going to the bank, my check engine light came on, which was the first time ever.

I had mentioned this to the teller and she told me the exact thing I was thinking, that, “the Lord is telling you to get a new car.” I had been taking my time about purchasing and she mentioned something about having to be under pressure to finally do it, like with the check engine light.

Maybe to most this might not seem like a big deal or coincidence, but having been in seasons of hearing His voice inside of me, then being in a desolate silent desert for long, then once again, the rain comes and that very clear message that God gives, satisfies my soul.

It is like rain drops in the desert, an instant thirst quencher.

Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.

Matthew 4:4

It is the confirmation of His love, undoubtedly letting me know that He’s listening. He’s with me and has not forgotten about me & that alone, is all I need for joy.

God of Creation

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Belt of the Milky Way

It’s amazing to think of God and His hand over creation. Every time I stare up at the sky, I’m so amazed at His magnificent creation.

The lyrics to the song by Hillsongs, “So will I” really gets me thinking about God’s hand of creation. Here are the lyrics:

So Will I (100 Billion X)

Words and Music by Joel Houston Benjamin Hastings & Michael Fatkin

© 2017 Hillsong Music Publishing CCLI: 7084123

VERSE 1
God of creation
There at the start
Before the beginning of time
With no point of reference
You spoke to the dark
And fleshed out the wonder of light

CHORUS 1
And as You speak
A hundred billion galaxies are born
In the vapour of Your breath the planets form
If the stars were made to worship so will I
I can see Your heart in everything You’ve made
Every burning star
A signal fire of grace
If creation sings Your praises so will I

VERSE 2
God of Your promise
You don’t speak in vain
No syllable empty or void
For once You have spoken
All nature and science
Follow the sound of Your voice

CHORUS 2
And as You speak
A hundred billion creatures catch Your breath
Evolving in pursuit of what You said
If it all reveals Your nature so will I
I can see Your heart in everything You say
Every painted sky
A canvas of Your grace
If creation still obeys You so will I

BRIDGE
If the stars were made to worship so will I
If the mountains bow in reverence so will I
If the oceans roar Your greatness so will I
For if everything exists to lift You high so will I
If the wind goes where You send it so will I
If the rocks cry out in silence so will I
If the sum of all our praises still falls shy
Then we’ll sing again a hundred billion times

VERSE 3
God of salvation
You chased down my heart
Through all of my failure and pride
On a hill You created
The light of the world
Abandoned in darkness to die

CHORUS 3
And as You speak
A hundred billion failures disappear
Where You lost Your life so I could find it here
If You left the grave behind You so will I
I can see Your heart in everything You’ve done
Every part designed in a work of art called love
If You gladly chose surrender so will I
I can see Your heart
Eight billion different ways
Every precious one
A child You died to save
If You gave Your life to love them so will I

TAG
Like You would again a hundred billion times
But what measure could amount to Your desire
You’re the One who never leaves the one behind

Gut Feeling for a Miraculous Healing

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About nine years ago I became allergic to wheat. I could not eat bread, cake, donuts, pizza and many other foods that contain wheat flour. If I ate just a tiny amount of those foods, I would swell up on the inside, have a headache, vertigo, IBS, or a rash for two weeks.

For someone who’s allergic to wheat, what happens is when it enters the colon, it makes the villi swell up for two weeks, which blocks it from absorbing nutrients. The body then becomes deprived of what it needs from food. For someone who’s allergic to wheat to continue to eat it can end up with diabetes or cancer.

If I had not spoke to a friend of mine who is allergic to wheat gluten, I would have never known what was happening to my body. She had been diagnosed with cancer twice and survived. After she recovered the second time, she withdrew from eating wheat gluten and afterwards, felt like she’s had been sick for so long. She has been cancer free ever since. It’s been nine years of gluten free eating for me. Although, here and there I get surprised when I unknowingly eat food with wheat flour.

Just to a make things more complicated, I started getting pressure right below the center of my rib cage. This would typically happen when I would eat or drink cold sweet dairy or spicy food. It would sometimes get really uncomfortable at night as I’m trying to sleep. After experience this on and off, I finally saw a doctor this Monday and she had me get an x-ray done just to make sure I’m free and clear of anything alarming and thank God, the x-ray was clear. She prescribed some pills that would decrease my stomach acid.

Two days later, I still hadn’t had a chance to get the pills. It was about that time of the day, time for the news and as I sifted through I saw the 700 club news. Thinking about how they pray at the end of the show and at times, they get a word from God for someone watching to be healed of anything physical, mental or emotional. For some reason, I felt that maybe tonight or some night they would have a word for me.

I casually thought about it and when Gordon started speaking, I heard him say, something about someone with problems with stomach acid, he went on about getting bloated, not being able to eat spicy foods, bread and pizza. Then he said God is healing your digestive system. At that moment, it wasn’t even him anymore as I felt the Lord in that moment. What timing! I had just been tested for wheat allergy and prescribed pills for stomach acid and now God heals me.

Even though it felt like God presence was in the room at that moment, I still had some skepticism so I decided to test it out the next day and today. I had cheese bread, focaccia bread, flour tortilla, semolina noodles and a hamburger with a regular bun on it. Each time, I did not get a headache, nor did I get stomach pains, bloating or a vertigo. I had been praying for the longest time for God to heal my digestive system and God has answered my prayer. It’s hard to make sense out of what has happened to my body, but it’s not supposed to, it’s a miracle. Miracles defy science. God really healed me. Hallelujah!

For those that have a similar request for healing, I ask that God will heal you as well. In Jesus name! Amen!

Starting the Day on the Right Book

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light dawn sunset weather
Photo by AKASH DEEP on Pexels.com

Every morning there’s that first decision of the day. What is the first thing that I should do? Although the first decision or action of the day may not seem so important, there’s one action that sets the arrow in the right direction, which to me is, reading the word of God.

I can’t count the amount of days where I’ve waken up on the wrong foot, looking at the wrong things on my phone, like the stock market, emails or googled something on my mind; then spent the rest of the day putting God last. Those days usually result in very little focus, getting not much done and feeling…eh.

But when I give the first time of my day to God, somehow, I get so much done, I’m very focused and more chipper than usual. There’s more to giving God the first tenth of your paycheck, but giving Him your first few minutes of the day really pays off. Days even seem much longer as if time was extended.

1 Corinthians 10:31 says, “Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

Matthew 4:4 says, “But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.”

The King Within

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Transformation of Jesus painting by Vange
Transformation by Vange L.

If you’ve ever watched the movie, The Gladiator, that is one of my favorite movies. What I like about it, is how it focuses on a character by the name of Maximus who went from a commander of an army to a slave; yet although he became a slave, he still had the same ability to lead a team in a fight to victory. He did not loose his identity because he was no longer a commander. He was still the same man that a dying emperor had chosen to take his place. Although Maximus was not a prince nor in the blood line of one, the man on the inside had what was needed to rule a nation and being a slave did not take away what was already embedded inside of him.

Watching the movie jogged my memory back to a story told by my pastor at church. Occasionally churches do outreaches, where they distribute many items to those in need, within or outside of the country. It takes money, volunteers, preparation and time. Sometimes people choose to volunteer their time, others donate money or personal items. The need was announced at the beginning, then at the end of service, a man who wanted to financially help out requested to meet with the pastor. When the pastor first saw the man he noticed his rundown looking clothing and his scruffy facial hair. He could have passed for a homeless man so when he told the Pastor about the amount of money he wanted to donate, it was an absolute shock. The homeless looking man wasn’t just rich, but he was a King from another country.

Before Jesus came into the world, He sat on a throne as king, but He chose to come into the world as a peasant. He did not come dressed as a king with gold and expensive clothing or with a palace. Some came to the realization of Jesus as King by being around Him. Some experienced His miracles and others, His love and grace. He came for everyone: the rich, the poor, the lame, the sinners, even the ones that the world would consider scum. He hung out with a few people that society abhorred, like a tax collector or a woman who once sold herself for money. He touched and healed lepers or what society considered, the unclean. He did not live extravagantly, although He could have by turning water into wine, healing the sick or by being all knowing. He did not need riches to accomplish His purpose, nor clothing to get people to realize that He is the Son of God. People saw that He is Lord, when they looked at His heart. He took the cross as a criminal would and along with it, the sins of the world: the hatred, anger, pain, bitterness and everything else that needed to be washed away in order for us to be clean and right before God. The sin that would have killed us, He took it upon Himself on the cross. With that powerful love comes surrender and worship.

Isaiah 53: 4-5 “Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.”